What does Charlie Sheen have in common with Mel Gibson and Chris Brown? His continual public outbursts serve as a stark reminder, of the reprehensible behavior that imprudent-minded, celebrity bad boys exact. In a weird and frankly, questionable twist, my "Person of the Week" award will honor this fact, as the infamously famous Charlie Sheen, will receive the title. And no, that is not a mistype; Charlie is no Martin.
The erratic and bizarre antics of Mr. Charlie Sheen—Mean Sheen as I call 'em—has captivated me to a Mike Tyson worthy, train wreck level. For the same reason I enjoy mindless, superficial entertainment like Jersey Shore—though, my interest in the show has waned immensely—I too enjoy witnessing an individual of undeserving wealth and fame, free-fall towards limitless insanity. Although, I must caution, I do not wish any illwill on Sheen. I sincerely hope he reclaims his life back, at least to a level that is not immeasurably self-destructive. However, for the sake of a fascinating story, I can still derive amusement from his devilish descent into madness. Despite an inherently injurious quality, some things are just too funny too ignore.
Our TMZ world of media has encouraged a frighteningly high level of outlandish celebrity behavior. Essentially, our society's 24/7 frenzy and hyperactive resolve for news updates has emboldened a media culture that thrives on peculiar, off-color storytelling mechanisms. Well, ladies and gentlemen, Charlie Sheen is the unequivocal King of Hollywood Shame. He is the kind of guy that can turn a mundane circumstance like walking his dog into a sensationalized national media event. Effectively, in a frenzied media state, anything that Sheen does requires reporting.
What type of reporting? Well recently, Charlie Sheen has once again voluntarily checked himself back into a rehabilitation center. The impetus of this latest rehab stint requires some background. First, Charlie rushes himself to the hospital after an apparent "wild party." He writes a $30,000 check to a pornstar, and walks into a hotel room with a "briefcase full of coke." Apparently, Sheen asks Kacey Jordan, his pornstar-partying-partner, to dump tennis-ball sized lumps of cocaine on the table, so that he could smoke the drug every "two to five minutes." Later, he is hospitalized after experiencing abdominal pains, likely a direct result of his latest excessive and abusive partying binge. And here's the kicker. Sheen still adamantly defends his opprobrious partying ways.
Have we not heard these stories before? These kinds of self-destructive actions make me wonder if Charlie Sheen is going to become the poster child, of the sordid celebrity, whose abusive actions leads to a fatal overdose. For his self-preservation, I certainly hope not.
Sheen's penchant for partying started way back in the mid-1980's while the bankable star was still in high school. Some of his most infamous mishaps include: an "accidental shooting" of actress Kelly Preston, hiring 27 call girls from Hollywood madam Heidi Fleiss, and Christmas assault charges filed by his most recent wife, Brooke Mueller. Despite a recent public track record of arrest, hospitalization, rehab, and divorce, Charlie's role on Two and a Half Men remains intact. Reportedly, he receives a robust $2 million dollars per episode; no doubt, a sufficient amount to sustain his expensive addictions.
Charlie is like a steroid-induced frat boy having fun. This is why his indefensible and appalling actions are so appealing. Despite a noted "Soap Opera life-style," Sheen's success remains imperforate. For this reason, Charlie Sheen wins my "Person of the Week" honor.
It is quite remarkable how someone of such reputed disgust can remain viable. His recent bad behavior has actually boosted the ratings for his long running sitcom, Two and a Half Men. If Charlie Sheen teaches us anything, it's that some careers can withstand almost any measure of abuse. This is decisively true if an actor's troubled life parallels his most celebrated public persona. In other words, playing a lovable reprobate excuses reprobate-like behavior in real life. I reckon Mel Gibson is mightily encouraged by this news. Perhaps, this form of thinking explains why a majority of people polled on the Lethal Weapon superstar—who became famous for playing edgy cop, Martin Riggs, a hard-drinking rage-aholic—would still see a movie that he stars in.
Perhaps, Sheen's madness is a product of fear of being controlled, fear of depression, or even a fear of mania. I am no licensed psychiatrist. My interest in Sheen is only shenanigan-deep. Whatever makes Charlie's dangerously beguiling brain tick is beyond the scope of my incendiary Sheen bashing blogpost. Well actually, I am not being too harsh. He is still the winner of my futilely prestigious award. All press is good press.
Sheen's crazy behavior has trumped even the self-indulgent, narcissistic levels of his famous "Wild Thing," Major League character by an infinite factor. I never thought such a development could ever be possible. His behavior is so damning and disruptive that media types ought to coin a category to define crazed celebrity behavior, and name the ignominious award after Charlie Sheen.
I once thought Mike Tyson was the undisputed champ of celebrity belligerence; the standard bearer of extraordinary shame. In my humble assessment, Sheen has supplanted Tyson. Others may argue that Sheen would need to engineer one more bizarre stunt; something that could rival Mike Tyson's looniest moments like chomping off part of Evander Holyfield's ear or covering the left side of his face with a tattoo. My argument is that Sheen's entire career of abnormal behavior makes his feat of infamy more impressive. Forget the rapper. His new name should be Ludicrous—the baron of mischief.
*If you still don't believe me, just peep the video footage above, compliments of TMZ.